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Saturday, January 2, 2016

Hanif Aiden's First Birthday

Assalammualaikum wbt,

I just realized that I hadn't blog about my baby's Birthday yet (4th December 2015) but updated on other things...Jeez, what a mom..haha. Seriously it was nothing much really, we didn't organize any hype parties, no fancy stuffs. Just intimate birthday dinner with KFC takeaways..what a stingy parents. Hey, KFC pun mahal ok nowadays. Haha. I did plan to have a get-together dinner with my grandparents whatnot, but it was so hard to gather everyone. Especially with my doctor sister whom works at odd hours and weekends, boo on that. My other nephews also at my sister's parents-in-law's, so, what a birthday without those two, Ahmad Nu'man & Ahmad Wafiy. 

For my parents-in-law side, we just bought a KFC take away and Baskin Robbins cake. It was quite a  proper so-called party because luckily my sis-in-law daughters were there (phewww!) to sing a Happy Birthday song and blew off the candles. I think kids' role are very important in any Birthday parties because they are the ones whom light up the events, set up the cheerful mood with their noisy mouths and of course, who else do we expect to sing a Birthday song?! Haha.
             




While for my parents' side, since my two nephews weren't there, I didn't buy the cake simply because of the "no kids, no fun" rules. I just bought 2 Ayamas chickens and ordered some pizzas. Heck, even my youngest sister weren't even there..hmmph. Sounded very boring right? Poor Hanif Aiden. I probably bet when he's reading this later, he definitely thought that his parents were not putting enough extra effort lol.

         

At one year old, Hanif Aiden can walk (and even run!) which lately making Mommy and Daddy to exercise more chasing him around. Being kids, he love to go to isolated spots like the power points, behind the cupboard and etc. Even if we block the area with a chair, he would actually outsmart us by crawling under the chair to go to his desired "restricted" areas (-_-). He can't talk yet but he mumbles a lot and love to shout. He now can follow when we say Bye Bye as "Ba..Baa..Baa.." and Ayah as "Yaaa...Yaaa..Yaa..". Leaving him for the work every morning would be the most torturous moment. The look on his face when the car pulled out the garage making me feel guilty and want to go back, drop everything and resign to be with my baby. E.V.E.R.Y.D.A.Y! At this point of time, I always wish that I am a Stay-At-Home-Mom and I would be happily ever after. But, I'll keep reminding myself and slap myself to stay on my senses that I have a mouth to feed, a loan to pay and building a better future for my baby. 

When Hanif Aiden turns one, deep inside me feel it's more on celebrating my motherhood journey. Wow..I am a mother for one freaking year! There were so many ups and downs and discovering my truly self that I didn't even know exist before. Taking into account that I am not a kid-friendly type (and still am..lol), I am suprising my self that I could actually love my baby unconditionally and take a good care of him ehemm *flip hair* and *pats on shoulder*. The proudest moment would be washing his poop off his butt with my bare hands. *although I will let him stand naked for a moment after that while I'm soaping and washing my hands*




When I was pregnant, I thought I was prepared to be a mother and think when the baby arrives, everything will fall into its place and the journey would be such a breeze like what I've seen on social medias. Unfortunately, there were not what have been portrayed. There were heartbreaking points, Mommy-Daddy arguments, sleepless nights, emergency leaves, miserable office hours and other bittersweet moments which sometimes put Mommy at her lowest. I can't believe it has been a year! And I am even can't believe myself had gone through them all alive! Haha. I am grateful and glad for everything that I have now, Alhamdulillah. 

There are many lessons I've learnt but most important is to never compare yourself with other mothers. Whatever choices we've made, it came from a very-thoughtful decision planning and that is what we thought the best for our children. Never ever cared or feel intimidated on others' remarks about your parenting style and never ever feel at any point of time that you are less-a-mother. 

To Hanif Aiden, Happy Birthday to you my dear son. Thank you for teaching Mommy the values of life, unconditional love and to discover Mommy's inner strength that I never thought I ever have. Mommy still juggling in balancing this life, setting up the priorities and stuffs but Mommy hopes that you will never feel less love from me. To more Birthdays and wonderful journey together....and oh, with daddy too :P 

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